Tuesday, April 22, 2008


On a fist to five scale, yesterday was a -3.


Five minutes into first period Leonardo spilled my coffee. I have a yearbook deadline looming over my head that feels something like the weight of the world pushing down directly on my shoulders. Houston weather decided to remind me (and my sinuses) why I can't live here for the rest of my life. Gmail has decided that I need more ads (not less) for penis enlargers and "five minutes for the best thighs ever!" I think I ate my body weight in chocolate and commiserated with a friend over nasty, nasty phone calls a very sick student made to her which resulted in him getting arrested and expelled and just left her bewildered. And me sad.

Then I broke up a fight on my way out of the parking lot.

Really, an anvil falling on my head could have probably only made my day better. We were well past chocolate and on to tequila as the only thing saving that day.

I was just in one of those funks where you want to just allow the grossness of everything to wash over you. You want to fester in the students not listening, the administrators (still) seemingly working in every way against you. You want to seriously question why you got out of bed today. If you're me, you add junk food and coffee and soda to that mess and then you are emotionally and physically clothed in junk.

And then a four-year-old got out of line to come over and compliment my shoes. Because she really thought they were neat.

And two new guys at the coffee shop made me laugh (probably because I was the only one in the place, but still.)

And my roommate watched bad bad television with me and didn't make fun of me for only have the brain capacity left to watch something stupid on MTV.

So as I went to bed last night, I decided I take those moments and ball them up and think of them before I fell asleep last night. And I thought maybe if I held on tight to them then tomorrow might be different.

And it will be.

Because when you take the good moments and you hold them tight then you're bound to see the other good things before you see the bad. The more you focus on the bright shining moments the less the bad moments hurt when they hit (because they certainly do hit). So that's what I'm banking on today.

It will be different because I'm not going to dwell in the grossness, I can't drink tequila on a school night and you can't count in negative on a fist to five scale.

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